The Ascent Begins

I was talking to a friend the other night over dinner about the struggles in my life. She said, “It sounds like you have done a lot of settling over the years.” I sat there for a moment frozen, listening to the hum of the restaurant and the clanking silverware, unable to respond to her very observant, honest answer.

In response to this notion, with the reality that at 32 I have already let many things I desired silently drift by I am creating this blog. It is a chronicle of my ever-changing battle to push forward through a divorce, depression and creating a new life alone. It is a journal of what I have learned and continue to learn from my mistakes. It is also an excavation through layers of the past in an attempt to discover how I truly wish to live my life, to unearth the things that make me want to get up in the morning. I am tired of feeling like everyone is on a well-marked trail to the summit while I am bushwhacking on a distant side of the mountain. The only thing I know for sure is that I adamantly refuse to quit despite how tired I am and how many wrong turns I’ve taken. The ability to continue on for me is possible because of the connections I have made with others who have suffered through some of life’s trials and tragedies. Their ability to persevere and become happy, conscious, deliberate members of society allows me to entertain the idea that creating a new and better path is not only possible, but the only true authentic action. My hope is that others in my position can relate to my journey and move forward taking bits of nourishment from my words as they make their own equally challenging ascent.